Monday, May 18, 2009

Contest Prize Pack

I've been known to pack lots of laughs into SFL giveaways. But never before have I packed so much love into one. Without further ado I give you...

The Random Prize Pack of Dumb!!!



Party Bikini Top - Isn't there a little hula curious in everybody? Used to be you had to wear a coconut bra and grass skirt to be legit. Luckily the rules have relaxed a little. (Which is a relief. The husk on those things causes serious fiber chaffing, or so I've been told.) So here's a party bikini top just for you. Notice I specifically did not choose a pink bikini top, you know, just in case a guy won.


Generic Frog Peep Candy - Green and yellow in color, never before has a candy company successfully marketed a sugar-rolled loogie. Three hocks per box.
OR

A left over Kentucky Derby cookie. It has icing. Let's move on.

Cast Awana, The Movie - The less heard of spin-off of Cast Away, both staring Tom Hanks. Speaking of Tom Hanks, what if Forrest Gump wandered into the Cast Awana movie? Imagine Forrest Gump in his Sparks vest, "I many not be a smart man Jenny but I know what my verse is." Precious.
OR

Left Behind II Tribulation Force - Starring Kirk Cameron. Here's what the box says, "Left Behind will have you jumping out of your seat and shouting at the movie screen, as you feel compelled to join the Tribulation Force." Join them? What?? Oh, wait. I get it. Join them to make a better movie. Plus, I've added Mr. Miyagi commentary: "You no kick your way into heaven. This movie very sucky-son."


The Redneck Spoons Playing Kit - Because what else are you supposed to do dressed in your bikini top, eating snot candy, and staring at your VHS box? It comes with spoons, which is spectacular. I took it out of the box and tried to play. I knew I'd be extra super good at it when the first instruction was "sit". If you could manage to be barefoot and pregnant while playing spoons, all the better.

Both winners announced Wednesday.

10 comments:

Ashley said...

What must we do to win these prize packs of greatness?

Helen said...

Stacy, nothing beats the support of a good coconut bra....

Lauren said...

yeah, I am with Ashley. I will fight anyone for those frog hockers.

WV: batshi. That's the type of kung-fu I will use to fight.

teamstrand said...

i am glad to have you back in full swing. missed ya!

cwatts said...

Haha- these are great prizes! Reminds me of some of the random things I get from family members...

katdish said...

Wow. I'm guessing your crap closet is even larger than mine.

That's fairly impressive...

Stacy from Louisville said...

katdish-
Crap closet? No, no, no.

I actually go shopping for all this glorious crap.

Jeff said...

The imagine Forrest in AWANA line has me canceling all children's ministry activities this week!!!!




wv Morshala: we need moreshala in our shala-lala -la - ka boom

Pam said...

Did I miss what the contest *is*? Then again, do I want to know what I might have to do to win an AWANA movie?

UptownHippie said...

Once I saw an ad for coconut bras in a catalog. It had the following warning that "the size of the coconut bras may vary based on the size of the coconuts."