Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Personal Evangelism Tool

If you happen to be reading this at work, in a local coffee shop, or at a public library, immediately stop what you are doing. Stand up right where you are and loudly ask everyone around you, "If you are not a Christian raise your hand." (People appreciate directness so they'll love you for taking the time to ask.) Then quickly gather all these wayward sheep to your computer, gingerly play the following clip, and let The Spirit move. Oh, and make sure everyone is at least 2 feet from your monitor so they will have room to come forward. Unless, of course, you are not one of the frozen chosen, in which case you will need to amass yoga mats to cushion those being slain in The Spirit. It will be similar to Pentecost sans the original cast. Good luck and God bless.

(P.S. Are you and Jesus homies? Apparently that is an option for those wanting to upgrade their salvation package to "gangsta status".)



Now tell me. Who wants the gangsta status? It comes with a free gotee and lowrider toga.

23 comments:

Beth said...

Um, this might be the scariest thing I've ever seen. I gotta go pray that God won't bring me nightmares...

jennyleigh said...

Uh, okay ...

Jan said...

Wow... some people have too much time on their hands, I think! Very funny, though. Thanks for sharing.

Helen said...

I liked it. Sorry. I hope I don't end up with a goatee now...

Donna said...

Stacey.....you could've shared this on mine and Elvis' birthday.....sigh.....

teamstrand said...

problem. my computer at work BLOCKED the video! Called all the people over here and then had nothing...

Marni said...

I tried that standing up and yelling "If you are not a Christian, raise your hand" thing. No one raised their hand. But I did it at work and we're a mission board, so I guess we're all saved. I'm gonna take my laptop down to Starbucks. I bet I can find some heathen sweaty Philistines (ha!) there that Elvis and I can proselytize to. I'll keep you updated...

Julianna said...

Wow. Very interesting. I work in a room by myself and I'm saved, so no proselytizing on my part. Oh well. . .

Loved the moving tear and the Popsicle ornament looking thing with "Homies" at the top.

bman said...

That was amazing. I'm not going to lie, I didn't have anyone around to show it to, but I will tell you... My life has been altered because of this video.
Here's some way's I'll show off my new belief system:
1.) Trim beard down to super-sideburns.
2.) Get a super-suit (with cape and awesome collar!).
3.) Shimmy while worshipping on Sunday morning.
4.) Practicing my lip curl while talking to non-believers.
5.) Pilgrammage to Graceland.

Wish me luck!

P.S. Wouldn't it be awesome if Elvis came back as a prophet and went around to different churches to let them know they've gone astray? "Jesus has left the building."

HAHAHA! Holy cow that was lame! Enjoy!

wv: runier
"My English teachers always warned me that my sentences would become runier if I didn't stop creating these long-winded sentences that tend to go on and on for a long time which does get pretty old, but I reminded them that sometimes people like runier things like soup and occasionally people like runier oatmeal, but I think that's kind of gross because I like my oatmeal thick and not very runny at all, and I really like the maple and brown sugar oatmeal even though it's not as healthy for you because of the sugar, but that's okay to me because I'm young and people always tell me that I'm so young and stuff, but I think they're just upset because when it comes down to a foot race, I'm way runier than an older person."
(As scary as that is... it may be grammatically correct...)

teamstrand said...

tell the truth...did you put that together?

Stacy from Louisville said...

Bman

"Jesus has left the building."

Brilliant.

Pam said...

Love the slide transitions - And is that Elvis, or the Gaither band?

Skerrib said...

Forget the heathens, I just rededicated my life twice. It was the picture of Elvis and the angels in space that did it. Was that taken from the Hubble????

Helen said...

Skerrib, "was that taken from the hubbble?" That was funny!

Nicole said...

Stacy!!!! I've missed you! I'm here in Austria! As soon as I got here my cord for my lap top broken and for a month now I wasn't able to read SFL or SCL and my heart longed for my daily read! The good news is that I had beautiful Vienna to distract me!

Anyways glad to be back and so glad to read this!

FYI me and Jesus are homeboys...in fact he is my bruther from an other muther!

Raw Faith Real World said...

Aaaaarrrrggghhh!!!!!!

Diggs aka David said...

Oh wow!
The tears are flowing from my eyes. I can barely see my keyboard as I attempt to type this. I am sending this to the pastor so we can buy a projector and some loud speakers to show this to everyone in town.

Andy said...

Let's here it for tacky!

BeckeyZ said...

Why does it always look like Jesus is wearing a pristine white "snuggie"?

Lynn said...

Stacy, left you a little award over at my blog! nealatthecross.blogspot.com

katdish said...

Sniff...sniff...that was beautiful.

John Dent said...

It may be due to the schools I grew up in but I cringe whenever someone says Jesus touched them.

Jeff said...

The "Elvis Presley Gospel".... somehow I bet that more people would recognize that one than the actual Gospel of Jesus.

The side benefit is that many people believe that both Jesus and Elvis are still alive. Sadly, more people would rather believe that "truth" about Elvis than about Jesus, though. BUT WAIT! - TIME-LIFE is helping to proseltyze the whole world on behalf of the ELVIS GOSPEL. Hallelujah!

@ bman - "shimmy during worship" GO FOR IT!!!!!

Thanks Stacy, I'll be laughing all afternoon.